Here goes nothing....

Okay, so I haven't told many people about this and really don't intend to.. but I feel like I need to get some things out & kind of want to use this as a journal per se of my 'journey.'

Run down~
Two years ago I made the biggest mistake of my life; literally. I am not sure if I am ready to disclose exactly what the mistake was to the whole world, but in a way I need to touch on it....if that makes any sense. As a result of the mistake I lived in HELL for 2 agonizing years and 1.5 years legally. Yes, LEGALLY.

As a result of the legal proceedings, I was given house arrest for 9 months and probation for 3 years. Sounds terrible, but it was the better outcome of what could have been; 3 to 7 years in prison. Shitty, but yes, I will take the alternative sentence.

I know a lot of people are wondering, what in the world did you do to face a sentence like that....well like I said, I may not ever fully disclose that, but I am not 100% sure. One thing I hate more than anything in the world is people judging others. Cannot stand it. I know it is a natural human thing to do, but at the same time, we can help what we say, not what we think.  And automatically casting judgement upon someone for a MISTAKE they made in their life is just down right ignorant as heck. So if you are one of those who judge others, then feel free the leave this blog!!!!

This past Thursday was hook up day. But let's back track a minute here. So in order for me to get H.E.M. (home electric monitoring) also known as house arrest, started I had to get a land line. Eh, not too terribly, luckily it comes with the cable bundle!!! Now to buy a phone. Shouldn't be hard, right??!
WRONG!!!!!! Buying a phone was the worst part!!!!! We bought one plugged it in but of course my luck I couldn't hear the damn thing ring. Off to the store we go AGAIN!!! Finally found one that lights up when it rings and is loud enough for me to hear! Back to where I was.....Thursday my PO (probation officer) came to the house and began the routine. Piss test, all the while she was in the bathroom with me. AWKWARD!!!! I asked if she had to be in there with me and she of course said yes. "C'mon, this shouldn't be award for you, you live with a female!" **side note, as you can see from the title of my domain....I'm a lesbian, married actually.** Boy did that make things uncomfortable even more. Yes, I live with a woman, who happens to be my wife...nevertheless peeing in front of a stranger with them staring at you, lesbian or not, female roommate or not, is HIGHLY uncomfortable. So I comply and pee in the tiny cup. Hand it to her and move on. Then she proceeds to put the anklet on which is the size of a half pack of smokes, but has some weight to it. after multiple adjustments, she gets it to where she feels comfortable that I'm not going to take the liberty of slipping out of it and 'escaping' house arrest. Then they hook up this monitor, which I thought would be rather small......nope the thing is bigger than my cable box.

So as all this is complete I am telling her my work schedule and providing proof of the times (its a set one) and the address to accompany. Plus I had to tell her when my Dr. appointments were so she would be able to put 'windows' into the computer. Windows are time frames that are approved times of travel for work and appointments. Anything after that your anklet sends a wonderful signal to the monitor that you are out of range and then there goes trouble. Which I probably should add, if I do not comply with the rules and such of house arrest, then my ass gets tossed into jail for the term of my probation. Which then comes the cost of being in jail as well as the cost of parole following release of jail ON TOP of the fines I currently have would just down right kill me. Yes, I know I brought this all on myself and I cannot complain about the fines I have because my actions got me them. All I am saying is going to jail would add more cost to pay later...I had no idea you had to pay for your incarceration. Yep, you do!

So today, I had to unplug everything (yes I cleared it with the PO first to make sure!) and put a larger surge protector in. My damn cable modem took so long to reboot I started freaking out because my damn anklet beeped twice. I starting panicking that the police were coming and that the longer it took for the modem to reboot the more trouble I would get in.  Once the phone line was back on track I hurried up and called the voicemail of my PO to let her know what happened and why I was off line for a minute there. My heart was pounding.

I think that is all for tonight, after all....I have 9 months to get further into detail.